The Coming Employsion

I look forward to recessions because they are followed by employment explosions, or as I call them, employsions. You get the best of all possible worlds - a long, agonizing period of unemployment... then a brief window of opportunity to get a low-paying job doing something you hate that you're not properly qualified to do. And then your VPN quits on you and you're isolated like a bear on a drifting floe.